


breaking the cycle

by planetundersiege



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, AtLA, F/M, Forgiveness, Gift Exchange, Hurt/Comfort, Justice, Pre-Relationship, Prejudice, Rebuilding Trust, Revenge, Talking, Trust, Wordcount: 1.000-3.000, Zuko (Avatar) Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:27:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27161117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: There is a silence in the air after Katara decided to spare the general that had killed her mother. Zuko was right, revenge wasn't the answer.
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2
Collections: Fic In A Box





	breaking the cycle

**Author's Note:**

  * For [firelord65](https://archiveofourown.org/users/firelord65/gifts).



> There's some light canon divergence in this story, were Zuko pleaded to Katara that revenge wasn't the answer.

There was an unbearable silence as Katara and Zuko sat on opposite sides of Appa’s saddle as the flying bison soared through the sky. There was only about thirty minutes left until they were back with the rest, so she had gotten off Appa’s head, knowing he didn’t need any steering for the last bit of the journey.

And normally, she would have loved to just relax in the saddle, not having to worry about navigation or anything similar, maybe she could have taken a nap or had a fun conversation. And that was the problem, since she was alone with Zuko, with no one else to talk to.

She didn’t know what to think or feel, her mind felt like it twisted and turned, and so did her guts about trusting him. It was so awkward, and she didn’t know if she should laugh and cry, all she wanted was to just get out of there as quickly as possible so that she wouldn’t have to acknowledge what had just happened.

As her friends had slowly started to trust the prince, she just couldn’t. She had given him her full trust once, and he had taken it and torn it apart, wasting it by betraying everyone and giving his sister the opportunity to mortally wound Aang. How in the world would she ever forgive someone like that?

Since before she could walk, back in the Southern Water tribe, everyone in her home had told her to never trust a person from the Fire Nation. All they did was to bring death and destruction everywhere they went, feeding on the fear and hopelessness they inflicted on everyone, and also enjoying causing severe pain. She had believed every word of it, after all, the lack of waterbenders in her tribe, the frequent raids, and the way the soldiers acted was more than enough proof.

There were no good firebenders, her father had told her, and as a little girl, she had seen it with her own two eyes as they took her mother from her. Brutally ending her life, which was such a wonderful gift to be bestowed. And, she had died protecting Katara. It had sickened her to her stomach once she got older and realized the gravity of it all. If her mother had pretended to be a waterbender, she must have been extremely desperate, knowing that they would actually kill her, a little kid if the truth had come out.

She could have been killed, and her mother  _ had _ been killed, further showing the evil of the Fire Nation.

She had thrown her prejudice aside for just one moment in the crystal catacombs, truly giving Zuko a chance, while he had rejected it. So, why did she ever think someone so rotten to the core would ever be able to change? Someone like that could only think of himself, and the moment her friends had just let him into their group she had been furious, feeling like they had been so easily tricked.

Katara had never let her guard down even once after Zuko joined, waiting for the eventual betrayal and the oncoming battle as they would need to fight him off before he killed them one after one.

But then, Zuko had disappeared with Aang, and they had come back stronger than ever, mastering a new firebending move, and Aang had told her about their life changing experience together, and that Zuko was truly a good person at heart that was just not the best expressing it. Aang had told her he wanted to change. She had just shrugged it off, still being sceptical, but Aang was still alive after having been alone with Zuko, and that was a start, even if a part of her was still saying that Aang was only alive because Zuko wanted to gain their trust before taking them out.

Then Zuko and Sokka disappeared, and Katara had entered into a frenzy, not knowing what to do or what to think. There were so many things that could go wrong, and they had taken their airship. But when they were back, Katara found out they had gone to the most dangerous prison in the Fire Nation and made a prison break, coming home with not only Suki, but their father. Hakoda had told her about how Zuko had saved everyone's lives more than once, and also told her that he was a great guy.

She still didn’t trust him, even after her own father told him that Zuko was okay, and even though Toph who could detect lying said that Zuko was okay, she was suspicious.

Then Azula came, and Zuko fought against his own sister to protect the rest of the group, risking his life several times during the fight. No changing side again. Even though Katara had heard about Zuko fighting Azula back on the Boiling Rock, seeing it in person made it a little easier to believe.

Afterwards they had argued, to Katara it didn’t feel right that everyone trusted him like they had always been friends. She had reminded him that she was the first to trust him, and the aching betrayal that had cut deeper than a knife. He had asked what he needed to do to make it up to her, that he would do anything for her to forgive him and trust him.

And then he had come to her and told her he would come with her to find the general that had killed her mother, and her entire worldview had changed. At first, Zuko helped her get there, but then when they got close, it was like he had changed his mind. First he had said this was to get closure and justice, but as he had seemed to reflect on it, it was like everything had turned. He had begged her to not go through with something bad, telling her that it wasn’t worth it, but that he wouldn’t stop her.

Of course she hadn’t listened to him, being in that headspace of wanting justice, she had felt that his words were empty even though they truly were the most sincere. Rage had taken over. She had been so caught up on revenge, truly wanting to kill the man that had taken such an innocent life, feeling like this was what she truly needed to heal. She had even used  _ bloodbending _ on someone innocent while trying to find the culprit, which was something she had sworn to never do again. All while Zuko had told her to let it go and move on, that revenge wasn’t the right option and that she would only feel terrible afterwards, incomplete. Revenge would never solve anything, but would only continue a vicious cycle of violence that needed to be broken.

She had wanted to laugh, hearing those words come from his mouth, when he had spent months hunting them. But in the end, right before she was about to make the kill, all of her emotions came back into her like a dagger, mixed with his words. At that moment, Katara had realized that Zuko was right, that revenge wasn’t the answer, and even if she could never forgive the general, she would accomplish nothing with killing him, but would instead carry a heavy weight of shame.

So, she had spared his life, and the two had left, jumping back onto Appa. She didn’t know what to say, where to start, or even if she should start. She felt so dumb and hurt by herself, both from the way she had acted against the general, and to Zuko. She still didn’t fully trust him, and it would take a while until she could completely, but she realized she had been way too harsh for someone that was trying, not thinking about his complicated background.

After all, it was a “murderous firebender” that had been the one to tell her  _ not _ to kill someone because it wasn’t right, and that had thrown out all her stereotypes she had built her entire life, making her more than confused at herself and the world. She remembered back in the desert, about how everyone thought that their war was just and that they were always on the good side, black against white.

In reality, things seemed much more complex now, and she realized it had never been so simple like she had foolishly imagined.

“You’re shaking.”

As she heard Zuko’s voice, Katara let out a surprised yelp, jumping in her place as she hadn’t been prepared. The silence had been so prominent, neither had spoken for hours, so hearing his calm voice felt like a thunderbolt to her senses.

“Sorry, did I startle you?”

“What do you mean I’m shaking?”

“Your hands.” he said and pointed at her, and as Katara looked down at herself, she saw that she was right. Her hands were frantically shaking, like if she would have been in a blizzard, shivering to keep herself warm. She hadn’t noticed, and now she wondered how long he had watched her before he had spoken up.

She took a deep breath and did her best to stop, and then looked at him.

“Sorry, I didn’t notice.” she began, not knowing how to phrase herself. “It’s all just… so much and I don’t know where to begin.”

“Begin where?”

“I don’t even know myself. I’ve got all these emotions inside of me, and I don’t know how to feel. I’ve wanted revenge for so long, thinking this was what I truly wanted. But you and Aang were right. When I was about to kill him, I looked him in the eyes and just couldn’t, even if he was a terrible person no one deserves to die, and it made me scared of myself. I should have listened to you when you said revenge wasn’t the answer, but I just couldn’t. A part of me says I didn’t kill him because I was weak, but another part says I was strong. It’s all mixing together as I don’t know what to think for myself anymore, or what’s right and wrong.”

“I understand you, it’s hard to let go, especially if the person you want revenge on did a terrible deed. It is hard to understand your own wrongs when you are blinded with rage, it took me a really long time to realize what I had done in the past was wrong. In the Fire Nation, we get taught as children that we are the supreme nation, and that the war was our way to show and share our glory with the world, to make the people respect us. I blindly believed it, and wanted approval from my father, and it took a long time until I realized that he was a terrible person and that everything he said was a lie. It was like I didn’t know myself anymore. What I had grown up thinking was the right answer all along turned out to be the wrong one, I had been on the wrong side of the war and hurt countless innocents. I didn’t know what to do, but in the end I realized that the right thing to do was to let go of my family to fight for peace. I know it’s not the same as you losing your mother, but you’re not alone with these complicated feelings of right and wrong. But like my uncle said, letting go is strength, and violence for revenge is a plague. I understand what he means now, but it’s a hard way to get there. But it’s okay to be confused, you should just strive to do the right thing.”

Katara nodded, feeling some comfort in Zuko’s words. She hadn’t thought about it though that perspective, that there was more to everyone than what meets the eye. Her, Zuko, her friends, and the people she didn’t know, no matter what nation. Just hearing that sentence made her shatter previous assumptions of all firebender evil. And it made her realize Zuko was more complicated than she had originally thought too.

He had been fighting real hard to earn everyone’s forgiveness, to prove that he wasn’t a danger, especially to her.

“Thanks, it’s actually comforting hearing it come from someone else. It makes sense, in a way.”

There was another silence, but after half a minute, Zuko spoke up once again.

“I know you don’t like me, and I know it’s gonna take a lot for you to ever forgive me, and that you maybe actually never will. But I want you to know that I genuinely care about you, and that I’m doing everything I can to improve myself and become a better person, even if I don’t always have the best answers. But I want you to know that  _ I  _ trust you and I want you to feel safe to trust in me.” he said. “And I want you to know that you can always talk to me about something like this, I’ve found out that talking helps a lot. And I hope that we one day can be friends.”

Katara nodded at him, and as she looked into his eyes, she could tell that he was sincere, he had been from the start. She felt bad about having been so hard on him, prejudice taking over, not even thinking about giving him a chance.

“Thanks Zuko, it means a lot. And I’m sorry about how I’ve treated you. I’ve been way too harsh, letting my experience of the Fire Nation blind me, not really seeing you as a person. But now I see that you’re actually trying to change. And I’m willing to try to be your friend, starting anew on a clean slate, if that is okay with you.”

“Thanks, I’m glad you’re giving me this chance.”

She gave him another smile.

The rest of the ride back was quiet, with the tone having changed completely. From now on, Katara and Zuko could heal together, slowly rebuilding their trust in each other, learning from each other and becoming better people as each day passed.


End file.
